October 2012

October 14.

Hi everyone.

I am totally, utterly and completely exhausted, trashed, tired out. I could just curl up in my closet and sleep for a millennium, but no such luck! My word! Life seems to be getting busier and busier and more and more fraught for poor old Bert these days. Oh well, you don’t want to hear me complaining. I’m doing this on a Sunday again and I really mustn’t make it a habit, they were extremely what L calls chinchy about me being late at the colony last time, so I had better get on with the news, or it will be tea time before I get there.

Tealy had been to the colony once on the Sunday when I last wrote, so she excused herself from coming back, she had work the next day and she was tired. I arrived alone and went straight to Mella’s. I got a huge surprise. Derry was up, out of bed, sitting in a swinging chair. He was still in his night clothes but he was definitely vertical. He told me that Kori had said it was time for him to start moving about and getting stronger again. It would be a few weeks more before he could go out, but he was definitely on the up. I honestly do not know what Mella and Derry and those lings would have done without Tealy’s help during Derry’s long illness, in fact I dread to think. They all talk about her as if she is some kind of angel and indeed she is to that family.

I stayed there for an hour or so and then went on a quick round of visiting. I popped in on Ikey and Vee, she was looking a lot better and Ikey was looking quietly happy. Tealy had been there earlier too. I also dropped in on Lita, just to see if she was ok. Lina was there with her, they were sitting together, sewing baby clothes and drinking tea. Mart was nowhere around. This was getting past a joke, I thought worriedly, really it was. Lina had her own youngling to consider and her own husband, she could not always be there for Lita and where was Mart anyway, not working on a Sunday surely! Still, what could I do? I might have a word with Mum about it though. She had so much on her plate at the moment, I wondered if she even knew.

Lita and Lina were very nice to me, I stayed with them for a while and had a cup of tea, but it was very strange there. They hardly seemed able to tear their eyes away from each other. They did not talk much and though They seemed to listen as I chattered about the family news and they answered when I spoke to them, it was as though their minds were elsewhere and they were carrying on a conversation I could not hear. I felt very odd and did not stay long.

I mooched down the thoroughfare thinking hard. The thing which kept nagging at me was, I had seen that kind of thing before but I could not remember where. I racked my brains, but it just would not come to me.

I went back to Mum and Dad’s and slumped into a chair. Mum gave me a cup of tea and a slice of nut bread with a slab of cheese on top. I was ready for food, but I was so deep in thought I could only pick at it.

“What’s up, our Bert?” asked Mum, “You look like you dropped ten grains an’ only found one. Somefin’ worryin’ you, son?”

“I’ve just been to see Lita.” I said.

AT this seemingly innocent remark, Mum turned away from me and began making a great clatter, washing up the dishes. Dad levered himself out of his swinging chair and began to chop some logs, which did not need chopping, into kindling sticks.

“Mart wasn’t there,” I pursued doggedly, “But Lina was. Mum, what’s going on there? Why is she always over there when her own youngling’s about to be born? Tovey wants her at home.”

Mum went on washing up, clashing the pots and pans loudly. Dad wielded the little hatchet with unnecessary vigour. No one spoke.

“You did ought to be getting’ back, son,” said Dad finally. “It’s getting’ late.”

I was mystified. Mum and Dad were never one for avoiding issues like this, but they were telling me in no uncertain terms that they absolutely did not want to discuss this. They knew something was happening and it was not to be talked about. Or thought about? Or faced? Hmm. I put on my coat, said my goodbyes and left for the Lair in a very thoughtful mood.

I was very preoccupied all through Down for Double. When we were having our glass of wine afterwards, L asked if something was worrying me but I did not say anything. This was something I just could not talk about and anyway I still was not sure what had made me uneasy. Probably nothing. Except that it was making Mum and Dad uneasy too. Oh to the low country with it, it was none of my business anyway! I went into my closet, flounced into bed and spent a very unrestful night.

On the following morning I awoke to my usual little scroll tied in pink. Wicked, I thought, what has Babsy been up to this week?

“Dear Uncle Bert.”

“I hope you are in good health and that the helping hand is serving you well. I am in good health and have received a good report this week.”

“Uncle I think humans is so stupid they is the stupidest things ever. Madam Prim says we has to make a fruit cake an we could choose which an me an Kryss is so good at cookin we thunk we could do it without them stupid books so we made it with a tin of that juicy yummy fruit cocktail them humans have an it went all wet an gooey an we got no marks! Leanna used all shrivelled stuff that looked like rabbit pooh an hers was a proper cake an she got a star an it’s a rotten zlenky swiz!”

“May the sun shine on you always blah blah not writing it so there!”

“Love B.”

I started my Monday in my usual gale of giggles. Fancy making a cake with fruit cocktail and without a recipe. Mind you, I have heard of cakes made using canned fruit, but you always have to drain off the juice. I googled a recipe for Babsy and found a yummy sounding cake which used canned pineapple. Next time there was a free baking period she would get a star if she followed that.

I went through my morning routine and then booted up Nia Netbook to see what was going on. I was very surprised to see an Email from Dad. What on earth? He hardly ever writes. The Email was brief and to the point.

“Son,

“Best leave well alone where your sister’s concerned and for stars’ sake don’t talk about it again in front of your Mother.”

Well, I thought, what on earth is anyone to make of that? I went to get breakfast in something of a fog. I had no time to think about it further though. L was having one of her ill days and Brian was very busy at work, so I was run off my feet all day.

The next day, Tuesday, was very much the same. L was still Migrainey, Brian still busy, things seemed to be going all right with the family, there was not much new to speak of. Derry was up and walking about the cube, he was helping Mella with light chores and playing gently with the lings. I had a talk to him on Skype on Tuesday evening and he told me how fantastic it was to be out of bed at last!

On Wednesday morning I had an Email from Tealy. She told me that permission had finally been granted for her to give evidence in a leprechaun court of law. I was incredibly relieved about this. It could mean that Marni would finally be able to get her life sorted out at last.

When I went into the den, Brian was already busy and L was still feeling awful. I made some breakfast and got busy with the work I had in hand, which was plenty!

At about half-past twelve I was getting ready to make myself scarce as the human cleaner was due. I said to Brian that I was going into the closet but that I would take my work with me. L was having a really bad day, so though he answered me, he hardly seemed to notice that I was there.

I was halfway to my closet when I came to a rocking halt. Illumination was flooding my brain as if someone had suddenly switched on a thousand watt light bulb. I could feel my mouth falling open. I stood where I was, thinking furiously. When Brian and L were first together, that was where I had seen it! Not being able to tear themselves away from each other, the sense that though I was in the room, they were in their own little world that I could not enter. The feeling of being one too many, however nice they were to me. WE had all adjusted in time and now we fitted together as easily as three snug peas in a pod, but back at the start… that was how I had known… oh! My! Stars! Oh holy moon on the water! But this was stupid! They were both married, with family on the way. This was not happening, it was not true, I had got it wrong, I told myself. But I knew I had not.

The buzzing of the door brought me to my senses and I ran into my closet to curl up in a ball on my bed. Whichever way I looked at it, I could only see tears, drama and misery in my family’s future. You know me well enough, I hope, by now to know that making moral judgments is not what I do, but however I looked at this I could only see it ending badly. You cannot keep things private in a lep colony, you just cannot. Our family was being talked about enough already. And did Mart and Tovey deserve this? I thought of Mart, shut up inside his grief, completely incapable of expressing it or of helping his wife. He had not done himself any favours that was true, but what would this do to him? I thought of good, honest, kind Tovey. A little over-protective, true, but the salt of the earth, one of the best. From things he had said I suspected he half knew already. What must he be going through. I thought of the scandal which would be heaped on our family name if, no when, this became common knowledge. Oh hand help us, I thought.

But I should know better than anyone that you cannot control who you love. And did everyone not have a right to be happy? I lay and thought about things until my head ached. Brian came and tapped the door, ready to go on with the day’s work, but I said I was not feeling well and asked to be left alone.

I must have fallen asleep, because I awoke to hear the magical sound of someone zapping in my room. I started up and there was Tealy! she was shrugging out of a soft blue coat. Underneath, I vaguely noticed, she wore one of her work outfits, a tight black skirt with a red jacket over it, red stilettos, red hair bobbles and clanking gold bangles. She clattered across the floor and perched on the edge of the bed.

“I was worried,” she said without preamble. “I just got the feeling things weren’t right with you. I see I was correct.”

“You got the feeling?” I looked at her blearily.

“Yes.” She looked uncertain. “You and I have become close friends these last months. When we, that is elves, become attached to someone sometimes we become linked to them. That doesn’t mean I can see your thoughts or anything. It just means I can feel strong things. Sometimes I know if you’re grumpy or when you get mad. Earlier I felt, I don’t know, something bad. Can I help at all?”

So I told her everything. She listened quietly while I poured out the whole thing and my mixed feelings about it.

“Lita’s my sister and Tovey and Lina are my friends and what on earth can I do?” I ended.

“Do?” Tealy gave me a sharp look.

“What on earth has any of this got to do with you?”

I gaped. Surely it was unlike Tealy to be so dense.

“Well duh! Somebody needs to try and sort it before it leaks out and we have even more family scandal and drama! Maybe if someone isn’t afraid to talk to them…”

Tealy stood up, her eyes flashing.

“Bert, you may have been playing God to half the family lately,” she almost spat, “But that does not make you God, nor his Lieutenant! You have your own thoughts and feelings about this and they are just that, yours. How do you know what goes on inside anyone else’s relationship? What on earth gives you the right to meddle until or unless you’re asked to?”

I just sat there with my mouth open. Tealy sat down beside me and put her arm around my shoulders. I jumped at first, but after a moment I realized I liked it being there.

“I am not saying it’s easy, darling.” She said. “But you have to let people work things out in their own way. You can’t save the world, Bert, it’s too big. Just be there if you’re needed and most of all, try not to judge people. Remember how it feels? “That disgustin’ elf!” She imitated Mella’s accent and made me laugh.

“You’re right.” I said. “Thanks so much, Tealy.”

“No problem. I must get back to work now. See you on Sunday, ok?” she gave me a squeeze and, just to complete my total confusion, kissed the tip of my ear. Then she had zapped.

I got up, went into the den, went back to work and shelved the whole thing. Tealy was right on this one, absolutely. It was no business of mine and no good would come of me meddling in it, nor worrying about it either.

Thursday was a kind of non-day. Brian was away working, so left on an early train. L got up to make his breakfast and packed lunch but then spent most of the rest of it in bed, she felt so awful. I kicked my heels, did a lot of housework, read, played games, pottered about on Facebook. Lita was on there, complaining she was about ready to burst! I had a chat to her and she seemed perfectly ok. None of that odd uncomfortable feeling I had felt on Sunday. Later I put my Skype up to see who was about and I had a talk with Tovey. He went on at great length about the new youngling, only a couple of weeks till it was due, he told me, he practically listed every leaf and berry he had gathered to keep Lina strong while she fed it, I had to smile.

When Brian came home we had pizza and all snuggled together on the sofa for the first time that week. L was feeling a little bit better and we were both really glad!

On Friday morning I awoke to good news on Facebook. Lita’s youngling had been born on time almost to the minute! At 5 AM, a dawn baby, a healthy girl. There was a very brief post from Mart about it, just a line, but I got more details from Mum. Everyone was absolutely thrilled for Mart and Lita. I went in to get breakfast in a really good mood.

“Lita’s had the youngling,” I trilled to L.

“oh, great!” L was still looking sick. “What did she have? I suppose Mart wants a boy.”

“Well she had a girl. Mart says it’s going to be named Danica.”

L shivered slightly.

“Isn’t that a bit morbid?”

I privately agreed, but kept my thoughts to myself. I was surprised that Lita had agreed to that.

Soon after Breakfast L told me there would be no Bear’s Lair show that day and went back to bed. Saturday was, therefore, a quiet one. WE got ready for the music machine, looked after L, did a little audio production for an upcoming project. When I had time I went back on Facebook, thinking to join in the family’s celebrations of a new birth, but it was all very quiet. No one much seemed to be around. Weird, I thought. Oh well. I found other things to do. Brian’s show went well and afterwards he and I relaxed together before heading for early bed.

The next morning I way overslept! I do not know why that happened, I must have been more tired than I knew! Anyway, I dashed in to get breakfast in a right old fluster. L was up, feeling a lot better, hurray! WE all had bacon, sausages and fried bread for breakfast, I just did not have time to do pancakes and after I had cleared up I made a dash to get ready and get to the colony, I did not even have time to boot up Nia Netbook to check my Email.

AS I was about to leave, my phone buzzed, it was a text from Tealy. She said she would meet me at Mella’s at about two. Stars! Why was she not wanting to come to the colony early anymore? Well, I thought as I zapped out, I could not worry about that now.

When I walked into Mum and Dad’s, no one was there. Strange, I thought. Oh, maybe everyone is down at Mart and Lita’s! I’ll just pop over anyway and see the new youngling.

I stopped at old Olford’s place on my way down, he was whittling away as usual, his whole cube full of the good smell of wood. I had a look at the carved things he had for sale, wanting a present for the youngling. I chose a feeding spoon with a D carved into its handle. It was made of willow, smoothly polished, delicate as a fairy’s breath, a beautiful thing. I paid for it from the small stock of grains I always carried and set off for Lita’s.

As soon as I put my head around the curtain of the cube, I knew something was wrong. Mum and Dad were indeed there, sitting beside the swing bed, looking stony. Lita was in the bed, huddled up protectively around a blanket wrapped bundle. Mart stood at the foot of the bed. I had not seen him since Danic’s farewell ceremony, I realized. He looked pinched and white, his eyes were burning. When I had moved the curtain everyone had turned to look at me.

“Come in, Bert,” Lita tried to speak naturally. “Come and see me daughter.”

“Our daughter!” Mart ground the words out between his teeth.

I entered hesitantly, wishing myself to the other end of the planet. I approached the bed and leant down to take a look at my new niece. She looked very small, but pink and healthy enough and she opened a pair of big, bright eyes and looked at me enquiringly.

“I brought you a present,” I said to Lita. I handed her the leaf-wrapped parcel. When the spoon was unwrapped, the room fell so silent you could have heard a dewdrop fall. Oh stars, I thought, now what have I done?

“Fanks, Bert,” said Mart quietly. “That’s real kind of ya.”

“Only fing is,” said Lita, in a quiet, deadly voice, “You got the wrong letter. We ain’t callin’ our girl after someone what’s gone and isn’t never comin’ back. This is Laralina.” She suddenly snapped the delicate spoon in two halves and threw them viciously towards her husband.

The quiet was broken then all right! Mart let out a sound somewhere between a roar and a howl. Lita began to sob. The youngling, who had been almost asleep, awoke and began to wail her terror and bewilderment. Mum and Dad stood up, Mum had begun a stream of vituperation, but Dad cut it off short.

“Ush up, LilyBella, Old your noise this minute! Come on, this ain’t no place for us, an’ you too, our Bert.”

Believe me, I was glad enough to get out of there! We walked down the thoroughfare in total silence until we got to Mum and Dad’s cube. Once we were inside and the curtain was drawn tight, Dad turned to me with a look as near to anger as I had ever seen on his placid face.

“Son, for stars’ zlendt sake, check your zlanny Email of a mornin’ will ya? We warned you not to come today! This place is like a zlanny snake pit as you just found out, an’ now you gone an’ made it wuss! May the ‘and give me strengf!”

The rest of that visit was absolute agony. I stayed with Mum and Dad for a while, but Mum kept wiping her face with her apron and dropping whatever she picked up, if she had not been quick with freezing spells she would have had no crockery left in the place! Dad was stony and absolutely silent. At two I went to meet Tealy at the zapping bushes. She arrived in a swirl of crimson wool coat over slim-fitting black trousers. Her hair was tied with crimson scrunchies and she wore a slim gold bangle on each wrist. I gave her arm a squeeze and told her about the debacle at Lita’s.

“Never mind, darling.” She said comfortingly. “You couldn’t have known, it wasn’t your fault. Come on, let’s go and see Mella.”

It was lovely at Mella’s. We all sat around Tealy’s wonderful spread, Tealy had Milly on her lap, I had Jemmy, Derry was in a swinging chair instead of in bed. Mella said that soon Derry would be able to do some foraging for himself and Tealy said it would be a pleasure to help as long as she was needed.

After we had finished there, we popped down to see Ikey and Vee. They were looking well and happy and made us very welcome, but the same thing happened there as had happened at Mella’s. Usually when a new youngling was born, everyone would be chattering like starlings about it. There would be lots of news, pictures on Facebook, family would be flocking to see it, but this time no one at all was talking about it. No one had mentioned it once, it was as if the poor youngling had never been born.

I popped in on Kas and Kori, just before I was due to head home. Kori danced to the door to welcome me and then she said one of her odd things.

“That tortoise won’t never get up the mountain, ‘ave all the treasures of the world an’ jewels on ‘is shell, if ‘e goes puttin’ ‘is nose into a fire! I ‘eard the story of baby flame, ‘e ad a thousand sisters an’ loved them all the same. One was yellow, one was red, one got drownded wiv water on ‘er ‘ead. Made no difference to baby flame. E loved ‘his sisters just the same. Come in, our Bert! Want a cuppa?”

I came in and drank about my eighth cup of tea that day. Tealy and Kori chatted, but I just sat quiet and looked at tealy’s gold bangles glittering when she moved her hands and thought of what Kori had said.

When it was time to go home, Tealy and I walked to the bushes and she turned towards me.

“Clever little thing, that Kori,” she said. “I like your family, Bert, I’m lucky to know them.”

“They’re lucky to know you!” I said. We stood there, just looking at each other. “Oh well, I’d better go,” I said a bit awkwardly.

“I suppose you had,” she said, leaning suddenly towards me. “See you next week. Take care, baby flame.” She did that kiss again, it tingled all down my ear. Then she was gone.

My stars, I was in such a muddle I do not know how I got home. I did though and we got through Down for Double, but I excused myself from the relax afterwards. I just wanted to be quiet. I curled up in bed and tried to figure out what was the best thing to do now, whether to buy Lita’s youngling another spoon with an L on it, but my mind kept wandering to a picture of Tealy in that gorgeous deep red coat, with the wind ruffling her hair.

I finally drifted into a dream where I was trying to crawl up a mountain of broken crockery, but my way was barred by a pit of fire. I knew I had to go through it to get to the top so I put my head into the fire. The flames licked all around my face, yellow, blue, orange and red and then suddenly somehow the flames all became my sisters, Gwenice, Tulia, Lita, Mella, Lani, others who you have never met, they all shouted: “Disgustin’ elf!” and tried to burn me. Away on top of the mountain I could see a swirl of crimson. I lifted my blistered face and swollen eyes and she was there, standing with her head thrown back, her ear hair cascading out in a way I had never seen it. Both her hands were full of long ropes of glittering stones which caught the light and were almost too bright to look at.

“Look, Bert!” her cut crystal little voice drifted down to me through the shouting and the roaring of the fire. “Jewels! Come here so I can put them on your shell! Come here!” She waved her handfuls of long strings of jewels so that they jangled and dazzled me with brilliance. I had to get to her! I crawled forward, trying to get away from the fire, but then I was not me, I was a tortoise, pulling a huge, heavy shell. The weight of it was crushing me, crushing me, getting heavier, I could not breathe…

I awoke, gasping, sweating and trembling, curled into a tiny ball at the bottom of my bed. The sheets, duvet and pillow were heaped over my head.

How I got through that day I really do not know, I was like a living zombie. I worked with Brian, made the meals, did housework, answered when I was spoken to and all the time the images from that dream kept replaying themselves through my head. Usually if I had been in this kind of state, L or Brian would have taken me on to the sofa and asked what on earth was wrong, but that day Brian was really busy and L had gone out to visit her parents, so I was left in peace to work through my own muddle in my own time.

Except I could not work through it. I seemed to get more confused every minute and the stupid thing was, I did not even know what I was confused about.

It must have been about half-past eight when I heard the dreaded knock on my closet door. I had been half-expecting it, half wanting it. I had gone in there after dinner, not wanting to be part of the evening relaxing. Now, as the knock was repeated, I wondered if it would be Brian or L, or both of them. I wondered whether to tell them to go away. But no, I had to get this out of my head, whatever it was.

It was L. She did not say anything, just walked over and sat on the sofa, then patted her lap. I have changed a lot this year! When I first started this journal I must have driven Brian and L mad, wanting to be on L’s lap every five seconds. Now, though I still like to be close to her, I normally sit between her and Brian on the sofa. But there are times when L’s lap is a comforting place to be and oh stars, you had better believe I was there faster than a speeding bullet!

The whole mixed up thing came pouring out, the Lita thing, the new baby, my mistake over the spoon, the way Tealy had told me off for wanting to try to meddle, the kiss on the ear, the dream, it all came out in one huge messed up mass.

L was quiet for a wile when I had talked myself out. She stroked my hair, which is what she always does when she is thinking.

“Bert,” she said. “What’s making you feel the muddliest? I don’t think it’s this Lita thing, is it?”

“No,” I chewed my thumb. “Tealy was right there. It’s just got to work itself out in time. I wish I hadn’t done the spoon, but I didn’t know there was an argument about the name, nobody said.”

“So, what’s making you so muddly and upset?”

“She kissed my ear. Twice.”

“Sweetie, that’s easy enough. Just tell her not to, if you didn’t like it.”

There was a long, long, long silence. I did not know if I dared say what I was wanting to and L did not help me, just sat and stroked my hair.

“I did like it, L,” I finally brought out in a despairing whisper.

“Yes, I know you did.” Said L, with a smile in her voice. I had hidden my face in L’s shoulder after my confession, but when she said that I sprang bolt upright. She was smiling. I just gaped.

“Bert, listen to me,” she said, “Do you think I want you trotting around after me like my personal lap puppy? Do you think I never want you to have any life of your own?”

“But you said… At Christmas…” I could feel my eyes filling up and I bit down on it fiercely.

“I said it and I meant it, no, make that mean it!.” L sounded fierce herself. “Feeling that way brings responsibilities. Brian and I care about you. I tried to tell you at Andi’s wedding but you weren’t listening to me.”

She took a deep breath and calmed down.

“Bert.,” she said slowly and seriously, “You are contracted to work here until you ask to be relieved, or you become unable to work, or Brian releases you. That means, for as long as you want to stay, you have a home and a job here with us and we love having you around. But, sweetheart, your happiness matters too. I think, for what it’s worth, you’ve been quietly falling for Tealy for weeks. Don’t push it, see where it goes, but don’t beat yourself up over it! There’s no need for that at all!”

We just sat for a long time then. L held me and I leaned against her and felt all the cogs in my head kind of winding down, getting slower and stopping. Everything was ok. It would all be fine.

After a while we got up and went in to have a glass of wine with Brian. One of the many things I like about Brian is that he knows when to leave things be for a while. When we came in he just said:

“All right?” and when L said.

“Fine now.” He just smiled and got our drinks. Of course, I thought, L will tell him all about it, but not yet. I cuddled up between them and almost dozed off, I felt so much at peace.

It was only as I got into bed I remembered I had not seen my usual little Monday morning scroll. I wondered why on earth it had not arrived and then I remembered my nightmare and waking up with the pillows piled on top of me. I had made the bed, in a cursory fashion, but the room had not been given its usual thorough tidy.

I found the scroll, crumpled and limp, at the very bottom of the bed. I opened it wondering what this week’s bulletin would bring.

“Dear Uncle Bert.”

“I hope you are in good health and that the helping hand is serving you well. I am in good health and have received a good report this week.”

“Hey uncle, thanks so much for that wicked recipe, we did free baking an’ I made a pineapple cake, Kryss made a peach one. I got a gold star an Kryss got a silver one, they both rose up real nice an were yummy inside! This week we got to make something spicy. Can you send me anything?”

“May the sun shine on you always, lots of lovely sun, you’re the bestest an Kryss says so too!”

“Lots of love from Babsy.”

Hmm, I thought, something spicy. Let’s see how they like L’s favourite chilli chicken burrito, I sometimes made it for her when Brian was away working and it always went downa treat. I scribbled down the recipe, told Babsy not to forget to drizzle on plenty of sour cream before serving, sent off the scroll on its magical puff of air and collapsed into bed.

For the next three days, comparative peace reigned. AT first the family status remained very much quo, except that no one made any mention of Lita’s youngling at all. Then my sister Gwenice, conveniently, wrote to Mum to tell us she was moving from Norfolk and coming home, arriving on Monday, which means tomorrow. She did not tell us anymore. We did not know whether she was being transferred, or whether she had left the healers or what. Mum, predictably, was in a taking about it. Everyone else was gossiping, even harder than usual, it seems that they were almost relieved to have something to talk about.

I got on with my work, made the meals, I suppose I might have been a bit on the limpet side, because I elicited a growl or two from Brian on the subject and he really has not growled at me for a very long time.

I did not see Tealy until Thursday afternoon. I had been thinking that it was getting to be time we did something about L’s birthday, but when I approached Brian on the subject, he said that he would need to be away that day. He said to make a plan with Tealy and take L somewhere in our world for the day.

I have to say, that was a good idea and I ran back to my closet and called Tealy. She said she would help and she turned up in ten minutes, looking gorgeous and striking in one of her work outfits, this time a Cerise trouser suit over a little gold top. Cerise boots, gold hair clips holding back her hair, gold bangles. Eye-catching but not the way I liked Tealy to look.

We went straight in to see Brian and within half an hour the plan was worked out, with the help of Nia Netbook and some searching of our website. You can hear some audio of it, so I won’t go into too much detail here, but oh! L is just going to so love her surprise!

When L came back, Tealy zapped and I thought she had gone straight back to work but I was wrong. I went back to my closet for something and there she was, sitting on my sofa with her boots off.

“I couldn’t leave without seeing you for a minute.” She said, giving me a smile.

I suddenly felt as if I had three feet and six arms. I had been alone with Tealy so many times, eaten with her, talked to her, even stayed in her flat that time I got myself into that stupid scrape! But now I looked at her, a million billion feelings I could not possibly describe here welled up inside me, I gazed into those huge aqua eyes, I could feel myself falling down into them and I could not think of a word to say.

Suddenly her eyes widened. She was looking at me in absolute and complete amazement, joy, wonder. She put out her hand towards me, as if she were afraid to touch me for fear I might vanish.

“Me?” she whispered. “Are you feeling all this for me?”

“For you.” I about managed to get the words out. She leaned forward, her head toward me, her hair almost brushing my nose. For a moment I wondered and then I had a flash of inspiration! Tealy was an elf, not a human! I placed a light kiss on her ear, near the top, almost, as near as I could judge, where she had kissed me.

Tealy gave me a dazzling smile, returned the kiss, which made me tingle from the tip of my ear right down to my toes and stood up.

“I must go, darling,” she said. Only it was not just a throw away term anymore. “See you Sunday.”

For one wonderful moment she hugged me and then she was gone.

I went around on cloud nine for the rest of the day, not noticing anything much. I was glad to get to my closet after dinner. I wanted to get to our website and do some much-needed research! I mean, what on earth would have happened if I had tried to kiss her as I had seen humans do? She might have slapped my face, or run away, or stars know what!

I looked at pages and pages, but I could find absolutely nothing about interspecies relationships except that they were permissible but discouraged. I looked for information about elves and found practically nothing except gossip and hearsay. I went to bed in a very bad mood indeed.

Not much more to tell, you will be glad to hear. Friday was a quiet one, L was out for most of the day and Brian was away. I went on looking for information and finding none. Yesterday was its usual mad self. WE did our pre-show prep, got the shows on the air, had our relax. Brian says I am going about like a dog with two tails. I cannot think what he is talking about!

Well, here is Sunday at last. It is nearly six now, it has taken me the whole day to write all this. I am going home tomorrow instead. Tealy will meet me at the colony in the morning because she has the day off, she worked today, I do not know how she knew I would take all day to do this entry but she says she did.

Today has just been work and work. I stopped about lunch time to make a quick sandwich and then I had a telephone call which went on a bit too long. Tealy was in her pink car, on her cell phone, she had a slack period, she said and she called me. I really should have been working but I was not going to miss the chance for a chat.

Well, I am getting tired and therefore disjointed and you are about up-to-date, so I will now stop. I must start getting ready for Double anyway. I hope you have had a good two weeks. Thanks so much, as ever, for reading. Ooh! Phone! I’m off! Big smiles.!

October 26

Hi everyone. Moon above I do love this time of year! I love the crisp weather, I do not even mind if it rains a lot, I love to see Halloween decorations going up in houses and shops, then we have bonfire night to look forward to and from where we live, if I look out of the den window I can see a magnificent display of fireworks from a castle which is not too far away from us. Soon after that it will be L’s birthday and with the hand’s help and a little bit of luck that is going to be a lot of fun and then it will be all downhill to getting ready for Christmas. I am really looking forward to that, let us hope I am fully conscious for it this year, I will certainly be taking no mad dashes across busy roads you can be sure!

Of course, in my home colony things are getting harder all the time, foraging is getting more difficult, it is getting harder to keep warm, but experienced leps with common sense and ingenuity can manage ok. It’s the poor and the feckless who are hardest hit by the Autumn and Winter months. My word! I really had better stop this rambling and get on with the news.

By the time I had finished writing my last entry it was far too late to do anything but hurry to help get ready for Down for Double. It was a nice show and we all enjoyed it. Afterwards we had our usual pizza, wine, music and relax session, which, being so particularly contented these days, I enjoyed more than usual. After that I was ready to send a goodnight text to a certain person and fall into bed.

The following morning I was up at my usual time. I found my usual little scroll on my pillow and reached for it eagerly, I always love to hear news from Babsy.

“Dear Uncle Bert”

“I hope you are in good health and that the helping hand is serving you well. I am in good health and have received a good report this week.”

“Guess what, Uncle. Blissa, Leanna, Sharriell and all the lot of them had a huge fight, they was all in it, an they all had to go to Madam Lynnara. Me an Kryss was good, we stayed out of it an we both got merits. Uncle, I really hate putting that hot thing on the clothes to make them flat, it’s stupid! Why couldn’t them humans make clothes what doesn’t get all crumples? You’d think with all the things they does they could’ve made stuff what wouldn’t crumple up in that stupid machine an then we wouldn’t have to spend hours an hours squishin it down flat after. Humans is stupid I said it a undred times.”

“May the sun shine on you an all that blah blah doodly dum dee, they can’t give me a mark cos I’m just too good an clever an very modest!”

“Love B.”

Oh that ling makes me laugh! She is going to make someone a wonderful worker one of these fine days! I started Monday in the usual gale of giggles, wrote back to Babsy and then got on with the day.

After I had made breakfast, we had eaten it cosily around the table in the den and I had cleared it away, I got ready to head for the colony. I was very much looking forward to going home for a number of reasons, as well as being very curious. My frozen-faced sister Gwenice was due to arrive home today and I very much wondered why. Apart from PattiAnne’s ceremony she had not been home for more than fleeting Saint Patrick’s day visits for a very long time and this out of the blue turning up just did not feel right.

I arrived at the colony at just before ten to find Tealy already there. It was a cold day and she was looking warm and pretty in a long turquoise coat which was just the same colour as her eyes. She wore long, slim, supple leather boots which exactly matched, silvery heart bobbles in her ear hair and more of them on her bangles. I wanted to give her a hug but I felt all thumbs and anyway was it done in elf culture? I had my cap on, so my ears were getting no kisses this morning. Unless I took it off, which would look pointed. Oh zlendt, I thought, this girlfriend thing was zlenky complicated!

I was just dithering there, looking like an idiot, when the whole thing was taken out of my hands. Tealy came forward, hugged the breath out of me, swept my cap off, kissed both my ears not just one. My stars, how I didn’t fall down flat I’ll never know. Then she burst into a peal of giggles.

“What?” I asked, slightly grumpily.

“Your face, darling!” she said. “You were looking at me as if I was a distillation you were trying to mix for the first time, as if you had no idea what to do! Surely at your age you must have kissed a hundred ears! And by the way, mine are still waiting.”

What on earth could I say? Where did I start explaining? A hundred broken fragments of sentences flashed through my mind. Lep culture, Shana-Sherin, training then work, but I pushed them all away. Standing in the cold outside the colony was not the time to tell her that A, I had kissed no other ears, B, leps did not go in for displays of affection in front of other leps so the only way I had ever seen it done was the human way, C, I had only ever been in love once and that was such a complete mess, well, you get the gist. This was neither the time nor place. I attended to the ears, returned the hug, tucked my arm through Tealy’s and we went indoors, but I felt deeply troubled. This might be about to get very, very awkward!

Mum and Dad’s cube was full of bustle. Gwenice was due to arrive at about lunch time and Mum was busy stocking up with food. Tealy offered to help but for once Mum was firm. She preferred to do things herself, so we leant a hand in a more prosaic way. I helped Dad with the fetching of wood and water, moving about of furniture for the hoards of curious relatives who were sure to arrive later and anything else that needed doing. Tealy helped Mum with the cooking and a neat-handed little worker she turned out to be!

We did not know exactly what time Gwenice was coming so we could not go out and meet her. We just spread the table for lunch and waited and at about half-past one the curtain moved and she was suddenly there.

I do not think I have had quite such a shock in a long time. My sister had been tall for a lep, a good inch taller than me, straight, supple and strong. When I had last seen her she was prim and neat, her sandy brown hair drawn up into a tight braided knot between her ears, her skin smooth, her green eyes clear, her rather thin mouth firm. She wore a crisp blue skirt and white shirt. She looked the picture of good health and professionalism.

A mere six months had wrought a terrible change in her. Now her shoulders and back were stooped. The brisk walk had become a slouch, if not a stagger. Her face looked red and bloated, the eyes glazed, the mouth slack. The lank hair had been roughly pulled back and tied with a bit of old twine. Gwenice had always been thin, now she looked emaciated and her filthy, shapeless clothes hung on her.

As she staggered into the cube, Dad dropped the poker and Mum cried in horror and ran towards her.

“Gwen! Name o’ the moon, girl! What the blue typhoon…”

Then Mum stopped, lifted her head and sniffed. Then we smelt it. WE all did. The reek of bad Zair and stars know what else coming off my sister was so strong that I swear it would not have been safe to put a naked flame near her!

I felt my jaw falling open. My sister the healer, the prim, professional, never-take-chances-with-your-health healer to turn up so dead drunk that she seemed hardly to know where she was? What in the world had brought her to this pass?

For a moment we all just stood where we were, too stunned to say a word or to do anything. Then Gwenice quietly crumpled on to the floor.

“Stars almighty, look at ‘er, look!” my Dad exploded. “She’s Zaired squared! Lil, we need to get ‘er clean an’ into bed. Tealy, could you give a hand, Zaea? Bert, don’t lose no time, son. Run down an’ see if Kori’s in. If not, leave a message, we need to get ‘er in ‘ere soon as soon. When you’ve done that, see if Tovey’s about an’ ask him to come down. If not, find Lina, wherever she is, son, an’ tell ‘er I need to see Tovey soon as possible. Understand?”

I understood indeed. Sometimes when you want to move fast, living in a crowded lep colony can be a real nuisance. The thoroughfare was crowded with people going home for lunch, or starting an afternoon shift of work. I battled my way through as quickly as I could and finally reached Kas and Kori’s cube. I was in luck, she was just about to start her afternoon rounds and was coming out of the door, her medical bag in hand.

I caught her arm and, in a few quick sentences, told her in what state my sister had turned up.

“Ooh, that ain’t good.” She said. “If she ‘ad glazed eyes an’ a face like you say, probably means she’s drunk till it’s poisoned ‘er system thoroughly. I’ll get what I need, wait a tick.”

She vanished into the cube and was soon back. We then made our way back to Mum and Dad’s cube. People let us through when they saw Kori’s white coat and medical bag, so it did not take us nearly as long to get back.

When we arrived back I left Kori there, I could not go in anyway as the tin bath was out and Gwenice was being stripped preparatory to being put into it. It was taking everything Mum and Tealy could do, she had come round to some extent and was showing a side of her I had not seen before and did not want to see again! Kori hurried in to lend an extra pair of hands and I went off to find Tovey.

I arrived at his house to find it cold and empty. Zlendt, I thought. I turned around and headed for Lita’s. My instincts told me that was where Lina would be and I was right. They were both there, Lina was sitting on the edge of the swing bed and Lita was lying in it with the youngling half asleep in the crook of her arm.

When I burst unceremoniously through the curtain they both looked at me resentfully.

“Lina, I need to find Tovey.” I said. “It’s urgent.”

She gave me a kind of vague look as if she did not know who I was talking about and did not care much either. I wanted to shake her.

“I don’t know where ‘e is.” She said.

“Didn’t you see him at lunch time? Did he say where he might be working this afternoon? I have to find him!”

“I ain’t seen ‘im, I tell ya!” she said, giving me a hard look. “Go an’ ask ‘is boss if you want ‘im, but get out of ‘ere, you’re waking the youngling!”

I was so mad, I could have spit fire and chewed brimstone, as L would have said! I ran off and, after a lot of trudging about, finally did manage to locate Tovey. He was piling up roots in a store room and hardly looked up as I came in.

“Tove, our Dad wants to see you as soon as you can manage it,” I said. He turned from his work and looked at me. I don’t know what I was expecting. I suppose I was expecting him to be out of sorts, sad, or putting on a face, something or other. He looked at me and gave me that fresh, cheerful smile the same as he always had done, like he did not have a care in the world. Tovey has always been an open book. If something is worrying him, you know, you always know. He asked what was up and I told him the story and that did shock and upset him all right, it was there on his face, plain to be seen. But there was nothing else.

When he said he’d come as soon as he had finished work I left him and started back for Mum and Dad’s feeling really puzzled. Tovey was not stupid. Did he really not know what was happening? Or did he just know and not care, surely that could not be true. I gave my head a shake. It was no business of mine anyway. Except that Tovey was one of my favourite brothers. But Tovey seemed to be fine. Oh come on, Bert, let it alone like Tealy says, I told myself fiercely and got on with what I was doing.

When I got back to the cube, things were in order and Gwen was decent, so I could safely go in. She had been tucked into one of the bunks and Kori was examining her thoroughly. She was asking Gwen questions, but Gwen seemed to be in a kind of semi-conscious stupor, or still very drunk and she was not answering with anything more than an unintelligible mumble.

“We got to get this out of her, Lil,” said Kori. “I’ll need lots of ‘elp, an’ it won’t be pretty. She’ll be better after, but we got to try an’ find out how she got herself like this or it’ll just happen again.”

Kori mixed a thin, milky liquid from some water and several powders she had with her in her bag. No, you do not have to skip anything because I will not go into what happened for the next half hour. Suffice it to say that pretty it was not! I was kept very busy fetching water and making up the fire. Tealy helped Kori and our Mum. Dad stood guard over the door and turned away the relatives who, sure enough, came to gossip and gawp. Finally it was all over, the room was back in order and Gwen was given a draught which sent her into a deep sleep.

We had just got everything to rights when Tovey arrived. He came quietly in behind Dad and gave a sorrowful look at the huddled figure in the bunk. Then he smiled widely at the neat little figure in the straight turquoise skirt and fluffy white sweater.

“All right, Miss Tealy?” he said. “You got a sparkle in them eyes these days. You an’ Bert kissed the wish stone yet?”

At this seemingly innocent remark, Mum and Dad stopped what they were doing, looked very hard at us and then shot daggers at Tovey. Tealy gave me a questioning look and I went bright red. Zlendt, I thought! That just shows you! Comes of living among humans for so long! Just. Zlendt! I had forgotten all about kissing the Wishstone. Mind, this was the first time I had been in the colony since… so maybe it was not so bad. I would have to talk to Tealy, perhaps she would not want to kiss it. Now, what was Dad saying?

“Bert, you can ‘elp, cant’ you, son? We got to get this done before she wakes up.”

The next thing I knew I was helping Tovey hump Dad’s special Zair barrel out of his cube. We lephandled it down the crowded thoroughfare, ignored all such jeers as “Don’t mind if I do!” and “Make mine a big mug o’ that!” and finally got it to Tovey’s empty cube.

Once inside I helped Tovey to roll it into a spare corner, which took some doing as the cube was already crammed with stores and necessaries against the coming of the new arrival. As we straightened up Tovey turned to me.

“Sorry if I embarrassed you, Bert,” he said. “I was sure you’d kissed the stone.”

“It’s ok, Tove,” I smiled at him. “Fact is I clean forgot about it. WE should kiss it only Tealy doesn’t know about it. I’ll talk to her and ask if she wants to.”

“Nice elf that,” said Tovey. “She’ll make a lovely little wife for ya, Bert. Everyone loves her, an’ just think of the grub she can make! We’ll all be comin’ to your cube for dinner!”

I suddenly felt as if the floor had been pulled out from under my feet. I felt as if I was falling down into a huge black pit, dizzyingly deep, sickening. Our Cube? Tovey thought Tealy and I were going to get married and come and settle down here in the colony? If Tovey thought it, did Tealy think it too?

I suddenly thought, in one blinding flash, of leaving the lair, leaving Brian, L, my work, my home. I thought of spending my life in a lep colony or elfhold and my first reaction which had made me feel so awful just got stronger. No, no and no! I had been born to live and work with humans, it was what I had been chosen for. I could not give it up, not for anything!

Tovey was talking to me but I was not listening. WE were walking back towards Dad’s cube. Tealy, I thought wildly. I wanted to kiss the Wishstone with her, to make a wish for love that lasted lifelong. I did not want to lose her, definitely not. OH, this was just another mess, a big, complicated mess!

Quite suddenly I did not want to be there anymore. I turned to Tovey and I said: “I’m feeling awful. I need to go home. Will you tell Tealy where I’ve gone and that I’ll call her tonight.” I just zapped out, there and then, before he had a chance to answer. Luckily we were in a quietish part of the colony, not many people saw me go but I really was past caring.

I zapped into my closet and I really did think no one had heard me. L was in the den pottering about and Brian was working. I had just got my coat and cap hung up however when there came a knock at the door.

L stood there, looking at me enquiringly.

“What’s wrong, sweetie?” she said. “what’s brought you back so early?”

Ok, so I am a big baby, well if you were in the kind of turmoil I was in you would have probably done what I did too. Or maybe not. Anyway, I ran up to L and hung on to her as if I was about to drown. I think I really scared her because she yelled for Brian. He was right in the middle of his work day, but he dropped what he was doing and came hurrying into the closet.

Well they got the story out of me by degrees. They are very patient people and this is not the first time nor the second that they have had to listen to my worries and woes and try to get me straightened out. When we finally had the story straight, Brian came over from where he had been perched on the edge of my desk.

“Bert,” he said. “Listen to me. L and I are not, absolutely not, going to interfere in your relationship with Tealy. That’s not to say we’re washing our hands of you, you know we’re always here for you, but if you’re going to be grown up enough to have a relationship then you have to make your own decisions and manage it yourself.”

I gave him a look of absolute blank shock. It was the last thing I had expected.

“I am just going to give you one piece of advice,” he went on. “you can never sort anything out or get anywhere if you don’t talk. However awkward you feel, it’ll get worse if you don’t communicate.”

“For example,” said L, “Where does she think you are now? Won’t she be worried at being suddenly just left? If I were you I’d give her a call. This is a good place for heart to hearts.”

They left then, leaving me with a lot to think about. I was picking up my phone to call Tealy, but I didn’t get the chance. There was a sudden zapping sound and she was there, standing in front of me looking a mixture of furious, confused and tearful.

“What’s going on?” she demanded. “Tovey said you weren’t well. You look all right to me. Why did you run out on me like that?”

“I’m sorry, Zaea,” I said. “Please, take off your coat and sit down here with me. We really do need to have a talk.”

“Oh it’s all right, Bert!” she flashed back at me. “You needn’t say anything, I know. You don’t want to be with me anymore, you’ve thought better of it, I can tell! You had your hat on this morning, your hat! Talk about hands off! You never pet my head or touch noses. You look as if you don’t even want to touch me! I can see you don’t want to!”

“I zlanny well do want to!” I lost it in return. “But I don’t know what I’m doing! I’m a lep, Tealy, a lep, not an elf! Leps never so much as hold hands in front of each other! Before they get married they get told what’s what by their Mother or Father, otherwise it’s a closed book! I left my colony at thirteen! The only way I’ve ever seen people in love behave is the human way and I was scared if I tried that you might be frightened or disgusted, or think I was insulting you!”

She gave me a wondering kind of look from those amazing eyes.

“Zaeahana!” I went on more gently, no, I’m not translating that, work it out for yourselves will you! “I have been searching all over the lepnet for information on elf culture and interspecies relationships, there simply isn’t any. I’m all at sea here and was just terrified of getting it wrong. Well, I got it wrong anyway.” I slumped into my desk chair feeling just wretched.

It really is quite hard to feel wretched for too long when a little person with a fluffy head comes and sits on your knee and cuddles you, tells you everything is ok and makes you feel so incredibly happy you wondered how you could ever have been sad at all.

The rest of Monday was just totally amazing. Tealy and I stayed in my closet, talking about our two cultures and a lot else. I came out to make dinner for Brian and L and when I came back, Tealy had laid our little table and there was a gorgeous chicken pie, stuffed with succulent meat and rich gravy with pastry as light as a feather. With it we had creamy mashed potatoes and red cabbage, it was just so good! Afterwards there was chocolate fudge cake and cream. I felt so spoiled.

Tealy cleared the table with a flutter of her fingers and curled herself up next to me on the sofa. I petted her head fur in the way that she liked and felt at peace with the world in general.

“Oh I forgot to say,” she murmured. “What did Tovey mean about the Wishstone?”

My hand went still.

“Well,” I began uneasily, “It’s a thing couples do. Some do it when they’re quite young, before they think of really settling down. Some do it when they get engaged. They go to the Wishstone, it’s in the Handers’ part of the colony and, er, kiss it.”

“But what does it mean?” asked Tealy, “Is it like a betrothal, or what?

“No, betrothal’s different, you have to register that at the Handhold and it’s very official. No, kissing the Wishstone is just making a wish.” I paused, blushing a little. “Making a wish for our love to last lifelong.”

Tealy leaned up on her elbow and looked at me.

“So it doesn’t mean we have to get married right away if we don’t feel we’re ready to?” she almost whispered.

“No, it doesn’t mean that at all.” I answered, stroking her head again. “It just binds us together, makes us special.”

“Do you want to kiss it, Zaeahana?” The question came as soft as a dawn breeze.

“Zaeahaan!” I laughed down at her. “If you’re going to speak lep, get it right, I’m not a girl! Yes, I do want to, Tealy. I want to very much.”

“Then we shall, on Sunday.” She said.

Well, it has taken me forever to describe one tumultuous day! I really had better get on. I was in bed soon after Tealy left and you had better believe I was tired out! It seemed only a second until I was dragging myself out of bed on Tuesday morning. I went through my morning routine and booted up Nia Netbook to see what was going on. Apparently the secret about Gwen’s homecoming had leaked out on account of she was now awake, suffering withdrawal and her screams and yells could, it was said, practically be heard from one end of the colony to the other. Oh holy moon, I thought! I was worried about Mum and Dad having to deal with that alone, they were neither of them getting any younger. I wondered if I could be spared to go and give a hand.

I went in to get breakfast and found that L was having an all right day health wise. Brian was working from home, so I asked my question and was given immediate permission to go and help Mum and Dad. As soon as I had breakfast cleared away, therefore, I left for the colony.

I really do not want to dwell on the day I had there. It was hard work and heartbreaking to see and in fairness to my sister I will keep most of it to myself. Mum and Dad were very glad indeed of an extra pair of hands. They both nursed Gwen with great tenderness and also firmness when it was needed and it must have been heart rending for them.

By the time I left I was totally exhausted, but Gwen seemed to have gone into a quiet spell, she was sleeping and Mum and Dad were catching a bit of a rest while they could. I told them I was not happy about letting them do everything singlehanded and that I could not come the next day nor the one after as Brian was going to be away from home. I suggested letting Mella help them with Gwen. Now that Derry was getting stronger all the time he was well able to look after the lings so that she could come over for a few hours.

Mum and Dad agreed to this, so I said goodbye and went down to Mella’s to arrange things. Bless her, Mella was only too willing to do whatever she could to help Mum and Dad, so I was able to zap home with slightly less worries than I arrived with.

I got home to a huge surprise. I really was tired when I zapped into my closet and I was dragging myself towards my wardrobe to hang up my things when a little figure in a dazzling pink cat suit flew at me, grabbed my cap, divested me of my coat, hung them up, escorted me to the sofa, exchanged my wet trainers for warm slippers almost before I had time to say more than “Hello!”

Well, the rest of that evening turned into another stunner. Tealy insisted on asking Brian and L if they would mind her cooking dinner as I had been worked to practically a standstill. She promised Brian it would not become a habit and he agreed to it. So she made dinner for Brian and L and then for us. When she had cleared away she could see I was practically asleep on my nose, so she soon took her leave and let me fall into my yawning bed.

On Wednesday morning Brian left for two days away. I stayed at home and took care of things. L was having a cycle of good days, so we had two nice days together, playing games, reading and talking in our usual cosy way. There was not much new in the family during that time. Mella had been helping Mum and Dad to nurse Gwenice who was still very ill but growing slowly better. Kori had been calling in a couple of times a day with various herbal potions and good advice. Everyone was gossiping fit to burst, of course, that was only to be expected. Gwenice was not generally liked in the family, which was mostly her own fault, as she never seemed to lose an opportunity to antagonise people when she visited. She always seemed to feel she was a cut above the rest of us, so there was now a certain amount of ill-natured amusement at her downfall.

On Thursday night Brian returned to us. We all caught up on each other’s news over our relax session and Brian suggested that, as the morrow was his day off and that as he was well ahead for the next day’s show, I could easily be spared to pop back to the colony and help there if I would like to. I was really pleased to be able to help Mum and Dad another day and let Mella go back to her cube and her husband and lings.

Friday morning brought me a surprise. I had almost forgotten all about Marni’s dissolution hearing. Now I suddenly received an official notice that the hearing would be reconvened on November 7. My presence would be required. I managed to snatch a quick call with Tealy and found that she had received an identical Email. Oh well, I thought, it will soon be over one way or the other.

As soon as I had breakfast cleared away I headed for the colony. I entered Mum and Dad’s cube to find everything in order, but Mum and Dad were looking absolutely tired out.

“Hi,” I said. “What can I do to help?”

“I got to go foragin’ son,” Dad said gloomily. “I ain’t been out since last week. As for you, Lil, you needs to sit in that chair an’ get a nap while things is quiet. Bert, watch our Gwen for us will ya? Kori’s been ‘ere an’ she’s ‘ad a potion. She’ll sleep, but she jus’ needs watchin’. You know.”

I knew indeed. I sat down beside Gwen’s bunk. Dad left to go foraging, Mum, much against her will, put up her feet and was soon snoring gently. I opened an IBook and flicked an eye at my sleeping sister once in a while and a few quiet hours passed.

The book was a good one and the story began to absorb me so that my glances at Gwen became less and less frequent. When a whisper from beside me said:

“Bert, is that you?” I nearly dropped my phone.

“Yes,” I whispered back. “I’m here.”

Gwen was quiet for a long time and I thought she had gone back to sleep. I glanced down at her to make sure and saw tears, sliding silently from beneath her closed lids.

“This is going to please everyone no end, isn’t’ it, Bert?” her whisper was barely audible. “Miss Frozen Face turning up so drunk she had to have the purge. I bet they’re all just loving it!”

I stared. I did not think Gwen had ever been home long enough to hear her family nick name. That must have hurt her!

“What, you think I didn’t know that’s what you all call me?” her voice was a little stronger, but still just a thready whisper. “I always knew. I didn’t care. I had my work. Making leps better when they were sick. That was something, something real. Something I could do.”

“What do you mean, Gwenny?” I called her by her baby name. she gave a tiny breath which could have been a laugh.

“Tried to make people like me and they wouldn’t. My friends at school only wanted me because I could help with their work. Everyone thought I was odd because I wanted to learn. Tried to be good enough for Shana-Sherin and I wasn’t. I worked so hard, but I just wasn’t chosen.”

She stayed quiet for a long time, the tears sliding silently down her cheeks and into her hair. I wanted to put out my hand, hold on to her, hug her, but leps don’t do that, not when they’re grown up. Finally, she went on.

“I went into healing. I worked and worked, I wanted to go to the Old Country, only that didn’t work neither. Wasn’t the right sort, they said. They sent me to a colony out in the back of beyond and I thought it was the end of the world, but it wasn’t. I had healing, I could do it, I could make a difference there.”

“So why are you in this state now?” maybe it was not a tactful question, but if she had something she wanted to do and believed in, why throw it all into a Zair barrel?

“Because they don’t want me there no more, dimwit!” her whisper was full of anguish.

“One of their own just got through training. Grew up there, he did. He came home, all ready to take up his place in the colony as the new healer and they politely asked me to leave and make way for him. They said I could stay and help him, help him! Me that had worked my fingers to the bone for them for the past ten years! Oh Bert! How could they?”

I threw caution to the wind, knelt by her bunk and took both her hands in mine.

“Gwen, it was a rotten, dirty, lousy way for anyone to behave, but getting Zaired squared isn’t going to solve anything, you’re clever enough to know that!”

She clung on to me as if she would never let go.

“I just wanted the hurting to stop.” She whispered brokenly. “I didn’t care if I went to the low country. What am I going to do now?”

“You’ve still got healing, Gwenny, if that’s what you want.” I said, giving her hands a squeeze. “You can apply to the gardens for another place.”

“I don’t know if I can,” she sniffed convulsively. “I couldn’t bear to start from scratch again, build up trust again, feel I belonged again and then just lose it all in a minute. You don’t know, Bert. The leps there, once I wasn’t a healer, no one wanted to no me anymore.”

“Then they ain’t worth crying over.”

We both whirled around. Mum was sitting up in her chair and looking at us.

“If ten years’ work an’ elp meant that little to ‘em, then all you can do is to walk away an’ go where you’re appreciated more. I ain’t sayin’ it’s easy, but you got all the courage in the world, Gwenny my girl, or you did have before you drownded it in Zair.”

Mum got up and came to Gwen’s bedside. She pushed the tousled hair off Gwen’s hot face and wiped the tears away with her apron and a gentle hand.

“Now our Bert’s right. Your healing’s somefin that no one can take from you. It’s a gift, that’s what it is. You worked ‘ard to get it an’ no one can take it off ya. So if you want to go on makin’ that difference, you can.”

“And don’t forget, Gwen,” I said, “It’s not like you’re alone. Family is family. We may have our ups and downs but we stand by each other no matter what. If you want to be a part of us, you always will be.”

“Right again, our Bert. You got a home here always, our Gwen, don’t ever forget that,” said Mum. “Now, Bert, I can ‘ear your Dad comin’ back, just ‘op along an’ see if ‘e needs any ‘elp. Gwenny, you settle down an’ try to catch a bit more sleep before your next potion.”

My word! Was I tired when I finally got back to the Lair! There had been no more time for talking that day. Dad had come in fully laden, I had helped him unload his haul, put everything away, then helped chop wood, fetch water, helped cook a meal and while we were busy Mum and I had brought Dad up to speed on Gwen’s story. Dad was indignant on her behalf, as were we all. Kori had been in to see Gwen early in the evening and had said the worst of the toxins were out of her system, but that she was now weak and very low. Kori had done all she could. Now Gwen needed rest, good food and to be with those close to her, that was the best help she could have, but the rest of the cure was up to her. She had to want to get well.

Mum and Dad shook their heads at this, we all knew what it meant.

A lep’s mentality is unusual in some ways. He can work hard all his life, put up with a thousand hardships and remain mentally balanced and cheerful under any kind of disaster or reversal of fortune. And then something may suddenly break him. He may or may not turn to the Zair barrel, but even if he does not, he can metaphorically speaking turn his face to the wall and refuse to go on. I have heard of humans doing that, they call it having a breakdown, they get treated for it, maybe it can ruin their lives, but it cannot physically end them as I understand it, unless they use some kind of outside means to end their own existence. For a lep it is different. If a lep loses the will to live there is nothing anyone can do: He physically just shuts down in a matter of weeks or even days. I desperately hoped we could save my sister from coming to that.

Brian and L took one look at me when I dragged myself into the den and said they were going out for dinner. I was so grateful to them. I was ready to drop where I stood. When they had set off to their favourite restaurant I called Tealy and we had a long talk, I told her all about my day and she was amazingly sympathetic. Then I just got into bed. I tried to read, but I was soon fast asleep.

Saturday was quieter than usual. L was not well enough to do her show and Brian’s was in such a state of readiness that there was no preparation to do for it. Brian and I looked after L and pottered about the house. I was glad of this quiet day because I still felt desperately tired. I had a chat to Mum on Facebook. She said Gwen was sleeping a lot and had not talked much more. Nothing much was happening with anyone else. The gossip was still continuing and I did my best to remind everyone that, whatever had happened in the past, Gwenice was our sister and families rallied round at bad times.

On Sunday morning I awoke with a groan. I absolutely did not want to go back to the colony, spend another day in that dolorous cube, make the rounds of my gossiping family. I just did not. I felt as if every mule from here to the Old Country had been kicking me.

I pulled my eyes open and then my mouth flew open too! Tealy was sitting, calm as you please, on the end of my bed. She was wearing jeans, a fleecy candy pink sweatshirt and pink trainers. Her hair was tied in pink scrunchies and she wore her favourite pink and silver bangles. She looked so gorgeous I wanted to eat her, right there and then! I made do with a hug, a touch of her nose with mine, which I think is downright odd but she seems to like it and petting her marvellous fluffy head.

“Good morning, sleepy ears,” she said. “You do look so sweet all snuggled up in there!”

I blushed to the tips of my ears, I can tell you!

“It’s wonderful to see you,” I managed to stutter, “But what on earth are you doing here? I have to get up! I need to get the pancakes ready!”

“Ah well,” said Tealy, dimpling roguishly, “I need to bring you up to speed with some facts. Fact 1, it is past eleven O’clock.” I would have stopped her right there, but she put a little hand over my mouth and went remorselessly on. “Fact 2, I have already made breakfast for Brian and L, who are now quite happily working in the den. Fact 3, I have Emailed your Mum and excused us from attendance at the colony today. Mella does not need me to perform the FeedMe spell anymore because Derry is now managing to do some foraging for himself and she is helping, so they are doing fine. Fact 4, I shall let you get up for a shower, but then you are going to get back into that bed, let me bring you breakfast and thoroughly spoil you. You’re looking absolutely exhausted.”

Well, what could I do? Have you ever tried arguing with a really determined elf? Because don’t!

The rest of the whole day I was just not allowed to do anything. I stayed in bed till a disgraceful time, I was fed, cosseted, made a fuss of, well, spoiled rotten!

In the afternoon L tapped at the door and asked if Tealy and I would like to come into the den. She said that they, brian and L I mean, would like to hear the latest family news and we could all have a cup of tea together while I told it.

It really was lovely to be in the den together. Tealy and I snuggled together on the Futon under the window which was plenty big enough for us and Brian and L were on the sofa. WE sipped tea and chatted for ages, almost until we had to get ready for Double.

I took Tealy back into the closet to get ready for her to zap out and I could not remember when I had enjoyed a Sunday more.

“Darling, do you think Gwenice will face the wall?” she asked me as she was shrugging into her soft blue coat.

“I don’t know.” I said, feeling depressed at the thought. “What she needs is something to focus on, something to make her want to go on. You can’t pull that out of the air. We can only pray to the hand that she will find it before it’s too late.”

Down for Double was a lovely fun show, after it Brian, L and I had our usual pizza, a glass of wine and a relax. Then we all went to bed early, ready for a busy week ahead.

Monday morning started with the usual little pink-tied scroll. Ooh good, I thought. Let’s see what giggles Babsy has been causing this week.

“Dear Uncle Bert.”

“I hope you are in good health and that the helping hand is serving you well. I am in good health and have received a bad report this week.”

“Uncle it wasn’t my fault really it wasn’t I just put that stupid hot thing down an went to look out the window at this red bird. When I come back there was a zlendt great burn mark right through this dress an I got such a wiggin it’s not fair Madam Mauraine says it’s silk but what’s so special about that, Kryss says silk is worm cleansings! I mean yuk! Anyway it’s all ruined an I got a black mark an I was in such a tiz that I was all crying so that recipe what said 1/2 teaspoons chilli flakes, I thought it said 12 teaspoons, well how the zlenk should I know, an Madam Prim took one bite of that burrito thing an she screamed an yelled for water and she says I done it on purpose only I never! So then I got another black mark an Blissa was laughing at me so I, well I punched her an there was a fight an I had to go to Madam Lynnara an it’s so not fair!”

“May the sun shine on you always and the helping hand keep you from harm only I think you should have said half a teaspoon not ½”

“Babsy”

Oh dear oh dear oh dear! I felt extremely contrite that the recipe I had sent Babsy had been the cause of some of her troubles. I wrote a comforting and apologetic note back to her, then got on with the day.

Monday was quiet and uneventful. We were all busy with our own things. I had neglected housework to do, so was kept trotting to and fro for a lot of the day. Brian and L were both working at their computers. In the evening I made dinner and then had a long talk to Tealy on the phone before my usual relax session with Brian and L.

On Tuesday Brian left for a three day business trip. L also started one of her bad Migraines, so for the whole of the three days I was a combination of busy and bored. I took care of L when she needed me to and for the rest of the time pottered about, talked to family on Facebook, Skype and MSN, read, did housework, did anything I could to pass the time. Every evening I had a lovely long phone call with Tealy.

The news of Gwen, meantime, was not encouraging. She was growing steadily stronger physically, but she was quiet, depressed and listless. Mum and Kori were both worried about her. In other family news, Lina was getting extremely near her time and Tovey was getting very fidgety, but he had not tried to put his foot down and stop her spending her days at Lita’s. Barty was strutting about, roaring about the elf being allowed to give her evidence at the dissolution hearing and vowing what he would do to Marni if the case was thrown out and she was compelled by the council to return to their marital cube. Marni, meantime, said she would run away or do anything rather than do that.

We were both of us very glad to see Brian when he returned home last night. We celebrated with a very nice dinner and a long catch up. I made time for my usual phone call and arranged to meet Tealy at the colony on Sunday as usual, though if I am honest I would really rather a repeat of last week, maybe without needing to be spoiled so much.

And so we finally come to today. That never takes long to describe. I got up, checked on the family news, nothing new at all except for Kori saying old Jockie was laid up and she had more to do than usual and made breakfast. We sat around the table with bacon, sausages, pancakes and coffee and when we had finished I collected Nia Netbook and set to work. Here I have been ever since. I had to move into the closet when L’s parents came to visit, but I just moved and kept on writing, I have not even taken the time to peek at them as I usually do.

So now at last you are up-to-date. In a minute I shall go and make a start on some dinner. Then it will be more computer time, then my phone call, then wine, music and relaxing. You are looking at one very contented lep!

I do hope you have had a good fortnight. Thanks so much, as ever, for reading my rambles. I shall write again soon. Big smiles.

Hi everyone!

I bet you thought you were finally rid of me! Yes, I know, I’m awfully late, I do apologise and my excuse is just the same, I have been quite ridiculously busy. Today at last I have a free day, so it is time to put aside all distractions and get down to some serious fingers to keyboard work. I certainly do have a lot of news, I dread to think how long this is going to be, you might want to grab a chocolate bar or a cup of something to get you through! Now, are you all sitting comfortably? Fine, let’s do this!

Well, let’s see, it was October 26 when I last wrote wasn’t it? The rest of that day went exactly the way I said it would and I was in bed fairly early. I was awoken by my phone ringing at some cold, dark hour in the middle of the night. Squinting at my clock I was horrified to see it was only three AM. The caller proved to be Tovey. Aprilina had just given birth to a healthy boy, he told me and he sounded over the moon about it. I tried to congratulate him as best I could, although my brain was thick with sleep. When he had gone I soon sank back into the land of nodd and did not wake up until L’s alarm went off at seven.

This put me into something of a tizzy, as I had to hurry to get ready and have the breakfast prepared for Brian and L for when they came into the den. I did not have time to do any of my usual early morning things like checking my Email or reading my Facebook. I had breakfast on the table in the end and we ate companionably together. When I had everything cleared away, Brian and L started work and I finally had time to check my computer.

I had a big surprise! Of course the family was buzzing about the new youngling, but there was more news. Kori had her hands full because old Jockie has the green blight. Apparently he neglected the symptoms, though he knows them as well as anyone and now he is very ill indeed.

Oh, I should explain. The green blight is a fungal infection which attacks our ears, noses and throats and, if we’re extra and specially unlucky, moves into our lungs. We can pick it up from eating unsafe plants. I have never had it, my Dad knew what he was doing and the colony foragers would never let anything with spores on into the colony store, but if you forage for yourself and you’re a zairy idiot like Jockie, then you are always at risk. Of course, the thing about green blight is that it is not always just the person who picks it up that suffers. Sometimes it is contagious, you just do not know. If green blight gets into our lungs it can kill you. My Auntie Jengli, Mum’s youngest sister, she died of it and she was a strong, healthy lep, only in her thirties. She caught it from someone in the water queue and poof! That was it. Oh stars, I am rambling today, I must get on!

Well anyway, as I was saying, Jockie had the green blight and only Kori was allowed near him because sprites cannot contract green blight, but she now had to do all the work of healing in the whole colony and just when winter is beginning to set in. There is a lot of work, lots of people with ordinary things close to the human colds and flu, more than usual amounts of accidents, cuts, breaks, bumps and bruises. Well, I read that Kori wanted Gwenice to help her to do the healing work of the colony. Gwen was more than qualified, in fact she would do a much better job than old Jockie ever did. I did not have time to read all the feeds, my help was wanted, but I sincerely hoped Gwen would accept Kori’s offer. It would be exactly what she needed.

The rest of Saturday was its usual completely mad self. We got ready for two shows, then they went on the air, both were great fun and everyone seemed to enjoy them. After that we all relaxed with wine and music. I had my usual phone call, then fell into bed. I was tired!

I was up at my usual time on Sunday morning and went through my morning routine. I had a nice Email from Tovey, telling me Lina and the youngling were doing well. They had decided to call the youngling Alfard after Dad. I bet Dad was pleased at that, though you would never get him to say so! When I logged in to Facebook there was such an uproar going on!

Apparently Jockie’s old neighbour, who sometimes helped him with a bit of cleaning and the odd pot of soup, had gone down with green blight. So we had a contagious strain in the colony. Gwen had taken up her post as healer and was helping Kori. Kori was nursing the victims of the blight, Gwen had to see to everyone else and the colony was in quarantine, no one was allowed in, no one was allowed out except for Kori who had to forage for the plants she needed to heal.

I sent Emails off to Mum and Dad and everyone else I cared about, telling them to stay safe, then closed Nia Netbook down, feeling deeply worried. Of course, my Sunday visit was cancelled but that was nothing. A contagious strain of green blight could be a really serious thing. In the overcrowded colony it could spread like wildfire and decimate the population. I suddenly dived for the phone. Tealy had been going to meet me at the colony today. Woodland sprites were safe from blight, Kori had told us so, but elves ? I did not know for sure, but I doubted it. They might have more magic but their metabolisms were very similar to ours. They could eat wild food to survive, I knew. I thought it was not safe to assume elves could not catch green blight. My heart sank when Tealy answered the phone and I could hear that she was outside.

“Hello, Darling,” her cheerful voice did not cause the usual lifting of my heart.

“Tealy, where are you?” I asked, feeling absolutely panicked.

“I’m waiting for you in the zapping bushes. I know I’m early, but I got fed up of waiting in Elfhold so I just came. It’s all right, no one has seen me. Well, no one except Kori.”

I do not know how I am still alive. I swear my heart nearly stopped beating.

“Kori?” it came out in a kind of frightened croak.

“Yes. She shot out of the outer doors and ran into the bushes to zap out. She was muttering plant names to herself. I called hello to her but she didn’t seem to notice I was there even though she zapped out only a little way off. Very strange. Come on, darling, are you coming soon, I can’t wait to see you!”

“Tealy,” I tried to keep my voice level. “You need to get yourself here, now. This minute. No questions now, I’ll tell you everything when you get here.”

You may think this was a silly thing for me to have done. Tealy had been in contact with the infection. Yes, I know I told you that Kori could not contract it, but she could carry the fungal spores. They are airborne and they hang around wherever victims of green blight are. If she had been nursing victims, she was carrying blight, It was odds on that Tealy was also carrying blight, which she could then pass on to me. Of course, I can see this all now, but at the time I did not care. I just needed to get Tealy here to the Lair, where I could see her and we could try to make plans to keep her safe.

Within seconds, Tealy had zapped in and was shrugging out of her soft blue coat. She came up for a hug and looked surprised at how fiercely I hugged her back. My beautiful Tealy, I was thinking, I absolutely could not bear her to catch this awful thing because of me.

“Bert, you look worried to death!” she said finally. “Tell me what’s going on?”

We sat on my sofa and I explained. I suppose I thought she would brush it off, or maybe get scared, but as the tale unfolded she began to look more and more furious.

“So, what you’re saying is, I am carrying spores now?” she asked. She stood up suddenly, her head fur all fluffed up so that it stood on end.

“Yes, I’m afraid so. We need to…” I got no further.

“You idiot! You utter, utter idiot! How could you do such a thing?” Tealy has a high voice, but when she lets rip at full volume she can shatter glasses. I reeled back in shock.

“Zaea,” I was stuttering. “I am so, so sorry, I tried to warn you not to go near there, but you had already left and…”

“I don’t care about that!” she almost spat. “How could you make me come here and put you at risk! Bert, that was unforgivable! Suppose you catch it and something happens? I am going to leave, right this second. Maybe…”

“No you don’t!” I was shouting myself now.

“You don’t know the symptoms! We need to make a plan to keep you safe. You try going anywhere and I’ll just come after you, so you may as well calm down, sit down and shut up!”

“Exactly what is going on in here?”

We had been so absorbed that we had not realized quite how much noise we had been making. We looked up in alarm and saw Brian standing in the doorway. L stood behind him.

“We’re sorry to interrupt,” she said quietly, “but this did sound very serious and something we should know about. Bert, why are you at risk and in what way?”

“I had better explain,” I said in rather a small voice. “Can we go into the den, this might take a while.”

We all went into the den. Tealy was still looking mutinous and all fluffed up. Brian and L sat on the sofa, I took my place on the Futon but Tealy stood in the middle of the room like a pelican in the wilderness.

Sighing, I told my story and saw the two faces of my humans growing graver and graver as I talked.

“Well, I can quite see why Tealy is angry with you, Bert,” said Brian, “But it doesn’t get us anywhere, what’s done is done. Tealy, Bert was and is trying to protect you. Please, sit down, we all need to think and decide what is best to do now.”

Tealy came and sat beside me and gave my hand a squeeze, which made me feel much better.

“The first thing we really need is information.” Said Brian. “We need to find out if elves can contract green blight first of all. Then we, as in L and I, need detailed instructions on how best to deal with it if you, Bert, contract it, as we will get no outside help as the colony is in quarantine. Bert, can you fetch your netbook in here, please?”

I went to my closet and was soon back, Nia Netbook was already going through her start up routine as I brought her in.

“What do you need?” I asked.

“First, we need information about green blight.” Said Brian. “Can you log on to your website and get it for me.”

Soon I was on the site and I had found out more about green blight than I ever wanted to know. I had soon downloaded information about its symptoms, how to nurse it, just screeds and screeds of stuff. What I could not find, however hard I tried, was if elves could contract it.

“Tealy, don’t you have some kind of similar information website?” asked L finally.

“Well, no, not really,” said Tealy, “Because we don’t have so much to do with humans. I think I told you once that Elfholds were very burocratic places. They work on a need to know basis. If you don’t actually need to know something, you are not told. There is no place like in the human world where you can just go and find out anything you feel like finding out.”

“But, Tealy,” said L, “Surely there must be a way of finding out what you need to know. After all, you do need to know this. And Elfhold needs to know you are carrying green blight. If elves can contract it then your Elfhold may be put at risk if you return there.”

“Oh help!” Tealy looked pale. “There is a way I can contact my immediate superior. But I am not supposed to show anyone. Well, I will be in enough trouble already, so a little more will be neither here nor there.”

She looked down at the gold bangles on her wrists. They had blue heart-shaped stones on them today. She seemed to be searching for the two largest ones on each wrist and lining them up. Then she touched them together twice. There was a slight pause, then we all jumped in shock. An elf had appeared in the room.

He was fairly elderly if the white fur on his head was anything to go by. He was wearing a pair of loud checked trousers and a golfing sweater. In one hand he clutched a coffee mug with the name Bilby written on it and in the other he held a half-eaten bagel. He was looking furious.

“For gold’s sake, Tealy! That is Tealy, isn’t it? Yes, thought so. What time do you call this? You had better have a good reason. And where the iron are we? What are these humans doing here? I hope you know you are in very very very very and I do mean very deep water if this is not good!”

“I am sorry to disturb you, sir,” Tealy sounded meeker than I have ever heard her. “Believe me I did not take this step lightly, but there is something that Elfhold needs to know and I need advice. It is a bit of a story, won’t you sit down?”

The old elf gave a kind of grunt, perched on a dining chair and indicated that Tealy should begin. She talked for a time and did not get distracted even when the elf went on with his interrupted breakfast.

“So what you’re saying is,” he finally said through a mouthful of bagel, “Is that you might have caught some contagious disease off this root cruncher here which may infect the whole Elfhold. Terribly clever of you, what what? Lucky I’m not really here myself or I’d have it too! Well, I don’t know the answer to your question, but I will find out and inform you soonest. We can do without you being away from work longer than you need to be, as you know. In the meantime you will remain here until we tell you it is safe for you to return, is that clear?”

He had gone before Tealy had finished saying “yes, sir, thank you, sir.”

“What did he mean about not being here, Zaea,” I asked. “He looked pretty here to me, half-eaten breakfast and all!”

“It’s hard to explain,” said Tealy. “The nearest I can come is what humans call a hologram, only it is not really that. It is more like his inner self was here but his body did not have to zap. Anyway, he’s gone now. I am so sorry, Brian and L, but it appears you are stuck with me for the duration. I truly will try to help where I can and get in the way as little as possible.”

“That’s ok.” L came over to Tealy. “This is inconvenient enough for you. You can’t go back and get anything from your flat. We’ll try to make your stay as comfortable as we can. Could anyone send you some clothes or any of your things?”

Tealy smiled at L.

“Don’t worry about that, L. I can run up clothes or make anything I need. She held up her hand. “If I could just use the futon to sleep on, I’ll make a nice cosy sleeping bag, it’ll be easier to make something my size rather than all the bother with human sheets. We’ll see to folding it out and putting it away. I really will try not to be too much of a bother.”

Once all the practicalities were settled, Tealy and I went to my closet to give Brian and L some peace. We forgot our worries for the moment and had a lovely day. I Emailed Mum and Dad to find out if they were ok and told them what had happened. They were worried, of course, but hoping for the best, as we all were.

I awoke Monday morning to my usual scroll tied in pink. Oh goody, I thought, I really need cheering up. Let’s hear what Babsy has been up to.

“Dear Uncle Bert.”

“I hope you are in good health and that the helping hand is serving you well. I am in the sickbay and have not received a report this week on account of being ill.”

“Uncle, sorry this ain’t much but I wanted to write a bit. I must have ate a bad mushroom when we did them in botny cos I been bad for days. Sister filipy says I’ll be ok an lucky it wasn’t worse.”

“May the sun shine on you an all that stars I do feel awful bad.”

“Love B.”

Well Zlendt, I thought. Poor little Babsy. I wondered at her botany teacher not checking her mushroom haul over before letting her cook them. I wrote back to the poor little mite then got on with the day.

Monday was a quiet one. Brian and L worked, I helped them and looked after the house. Tealy spent her time in my closet, glued to my computer. She was having a blast on Google and Wikipaedia. The news from the colony was not good. There had been two more confirmed cases of blight, but thankfully they were both near neighbours of Jockie, so the outbreak was so far being contained in one area. But Kori did not live in that area and she had to go home at night. However hard she tried and even though she was using full quarantine procedure before leaving the infected area, she may still be spreading spores, we just did not know.

On Tuesday morning I got some good news along with the grim. I had an Email from the family who ran the Gardens of Everlasting Peace. This is one of the strongholds of old lep magic and tealy and I, in what felt like another life, had planned to take L there for her birthday. I had submitted an application for all three of us and on Tuesday I got the Email to tell me that my request had been accepted. I was really pleased about this and hoped desperately that we would be able to go.

The news from the colony was no better but no worse. No more cases of blight, but Jockie was very much worse, the blight having got on to his lungs. The other three sufferers were also gravely ill. It was being said on Facebook that it was an aggressive and virulent spore. Yikes, I thought. All I needed to hear!

On Tuesday morning we all four got on with our usual occupations. On Tuesday afternoon L startled me to bits. She got ready and went out, saying she was going to the gym. Now everyone knows that L is one of my favourite people but the gym? She does not do hard exercise, she just does not. I wondered at this new development and if she would come back in one piece! She did and also very full of beans. She has been to the gym several more times since and I am wondering who put what in her coffee. Never mind, I do not think it will last!

Well, the rest of Tuesday was nice and normal and on Wednesday morning I had an Email from Kori. She told me that Jockie had set out for the high country late the night before and that the council had asked her to take his place. She had said no, as she was a sprite and every colony should have a lep healer. She had suggested that Gwen be made full colony healer and she would assist as before. The council had accepted her suggestion, Gwen agreed and the old country had confirmed her appointment. Just wow, I thought!

She also told me that if there were no more cases of blight, the colony would be out of quarantine by Saturday night. A week’s quarantine was all that was necessary as the spores mostly died then, although some of them could lie dormant for up to a month, but she thought this very unlikely.

This was such good news! I told Tealy and we were both really pleased. Tealy Emailed her Elfhold and soon had word back that she could return to her flat on Sunday if no symptoms had manifested themselves in the meantime.

The next few days were quiet, peaceful and uneventful. We all three of us worked, Tealy helped me where she could, tried to stay out of everyone’s way, had a great time on my computer, exploring human websites and our evenings were very cosy times. Tealy came and joined in when we had finished for the day and the relaxing with wine and music took place. If we had not all been so worried it would have been a lovely time, but it felt as if a big dark cloud was hanging over us all.

The blight in the colony spread no further, for which we all gave the hand fervent thanks. It claimed the lives of everyone who had contracted it though. This made me even more terrified lest Tealy should go down with it. I should have been even more frightened for myself, but I just wasn’t. I was too wrapped up in watching for Tealy’s beautiful eyes to become inflamed, or for her to start getting headaches, or, hand forbid, for green mucus to come from her ears or nose. I watched her so closely that Tealy became rather irritable.

“Darling you really have to stop jumping if I so much as clear my throat!” she said on Friday evening. “It’s beginning to get on my nerves. I know you’re concerned for me and I love you for it, but what happens is going to happen and you working yourself up into a fantod and fever is not going to help either of us. I am watching you just as closely, you had better believe it! But I am trying not to be a bother about it.”

I felt about an inch high, but took her words to heart and did try to stop acting like a cat on hot bricks.

Saturday was its usual completely mad self, only more so really. WE had lots of work to do for the shows and having one more person in the lair seemed to make everything not run in its usual smooth way. We got both shows on the air in the end and I think everyone enjoyed them. Just before I went to bed I had a text from Mum to say that the quarantine on the colony had been lifted, so she would like to see Kori and I the next day. I went to bed with a lifting of my spirits. WE had all been cooped up in the lair all week and it would do us all good to have a break from each other. Besides, I had an errand to do in the colony, it was well time it got done.

I must have been more tired than I thought, because I was woken by a little hand touching my head. I jumped awake and there was Tealy, all up and dressed in a neat blue dress with a soft patterned cashmere cardigan over her shoulders. She wore the gold bangles with the blue hearts and the matching hair scrunchies which she had worn all week. She also had on long, soft blue boots.

“Sleepy-ears!” she said affectionately. “Come and have breakfast. WE must get going soon. Brian and L have had theirs. Yours is on the table, just put on your robe and come and eat before it gets cold.”

Well, I have already said there is no arguing with a determined elf. I had soon eaten, showered and dressed and we set out for the colony. I do not know what I was expecting, but I got a surprise. The colony was quieter than I have ever seen it. The thoroughfare was much less crowded than usual. There was much less activity everywhere.

When we walked into Mum and Dad’s cube, Mum was in there alone. She looked thin, white and frail.

“Hi, Mum, I said, “What’s happening, why is it so quiet everywhere?”

“It’s been a bad thing, son,” she said. “Everyone who can forage is out foragin’. This thing come on us completely out o’ the blue, an’ the council was took off guard. The stores was low an’ leps couldn’t get food.” I felt myself go cold all over.

“Didn’t they have preserved stuff stockpiled?” I asked in disbelief.

“Nope. That Orlan, what was made chief storekeeper last year, well ‘e’s a regular idiot. They ‘ad some, but ‘e always used to tell ‘em to save the space for fresh stuff, ‘e said there weren’t no need to pile up preserves cos they’d only get stole. When the fresh run out nobody ‘ad nothin’. The stronger ones tried to get through it. The rest ‘ad to go into WillSleep.”

“What?” I stared in disbelief. WillSleep is the equivalent of an animal going into hibernation in winter. It is a lep’s last, desperate gamble to stay alive and it does not always pay off. “But you lose so much bodyweight in WillSleep! For a starving lep to do that is desperately risky!”

“You don’t ‘ave to tell me that, son.” Mum looked suddenly very old.

“I don’t know ‘ow many we’ll lose cos of Orlan. I’m guessin’ it’ll be a lot.”

I suddenly sat down.

“Mum, you’re not telling me any of ours went into WillSleep? Oh moon, please no!”

“Ours is no different to no one else, son.” She said wearily. “We got some good foragers in this family, an’ we got some as got the sense to preserve all they can. Then we got some who think food is less important than makin’ grains an’ getting’ on. Then we got some that’s just plain not good at findin’ what’s there. I know some of ‘em’s gone into WillSleep. WE can only pray that they made it. Pray is all we can do. Gwenny’s away round ‘em all now to give the wake potion an’ see…” she petered out and bowed her head, trembling.

I wanted to ask Mum exactly who had gone into WillSleep but I could see she was too weak herself to endure much talk. Tealy fluttered her fingers and we were soon feeding Mum soup and soft bread. After that we insisted she go to bed and rest.

Tealy was terribly anxious about Mella and Derry, she had grown terribly fond of them and the five lings. I was also terrified for them, so we tiptoed out as soon as Mum was sleeping peacefully and were soon at their cube. I almost dreaded to put my head around the curtain door, but as soon as I did I saw Derry sitting at the bare table, Mella moving about, tidying up and the lings sitting quietly in swing chairs. I counted. They were all there, even Milly. Thank the hand, I thought.

We went in and received a great welcome. Everyone was weak and quiet, but alive and awake. WE soon had food on the table and were helping the little ones.

When we got back to Mum and Dad’s, Dad was there. He was putting away his haul. I saw he had got as much as he could carry and was looking tired out. I helped him, while Tealy went to work again and soon had food on the table.

We were all sitting around, eating bread, cheese and salad, when Gwen came in looking grave.

“Well we been lucky, Mum,” she said, sitting down and helping herself to food. “It could have been a lot worse.”

“We did lose some though, girl?” that was Dad. “Don’t spare us nor beat round the zlenkin bush for stars’ sake. That ain’t goin’ to make nuffin better. Let’s ‘ave it.”

“Bento’s gone, Dad, an Abby an’ their four. Ben wasn’t never no good at foragin’ an’ when the rations run out…”

I reeled. I never had much to do with my brother ben, but all the same. He was my brother.

“That all?” Dad was looking determinedly at Gwen.

“No, Dad, sorry, there’s more. Barty…”

“Not Barty!”

I just couldn’t believe it. My pompous brother, so in control of everything. I just did not believe he would ever go into WillSleep.

“Shut up our Bert!” Dad snapped at me. “What about Barty, our Gwen?”

“Barty’s in deep water, Dad. He wouldn’t respond to the potion, but he ain’t gone. Kori’s taking care of him an’ maybe we won’t lose him.”

“Pray to the hand!” sobbed Mum.

“I’m sorry, but there’s more. Mart didn’t make it. Nor did Lita’s youngling. Lita’s awake, but I don’t know if she’ll make it, I’m afraid she might face the wall after this.”

To say we were shell shocked was an understatement. Lita has been through so so much this year and now this!

“I got to go to ‘er.” Mum got out of her chair.

“I wouldn’t, Mum. I asked her to come back here with me. She said she was staying where she was and just wanted to be left alone.”

“Pish! Times like this you need your Mum. I won’t be long, Alfie, I’ll try an’ get her to come back here for a bit till she decides what she wants to do.”

AS Mum went off, Tealy and I looked at each other meaningfully. I would have been willing to bet every piece of Gap clothing in my wardrobe that poor Lita wasn’t alone in her cube.

Gwen soon left again, she had much to do in the colony. Dad, Tealy and I got busy around the cube. It must only have been half an hour before Mum came back, but it seemed a lot longer to me.

Mum came in looking tired but completely calm and sat down in her chair.

“Lita didn’t wanna come back wiv you Lil?” asked Dad.

“No need.” Mum poured herself a cup of tea. “Tovey and Lina was there. They’re takin’ Lita wiv them. They’ll look after ‘er.”

Tovey was taking Lita to live in their cube? Um ok. So now he got to see his wife and my sister not be able to take their eyes off each other every day? What was going on?

I just shook my head and shrugged. Not my business.

We stayed for a while longer, but it was getting late and I had something to do before I had to go back to get ready for the evening show. Tealy and I said goodbye to Mum and Dad and walked down the thoroughfare towards the back wall of the colony.

“Where are we going?” asked Tealy.

“You’ll see, Zaea,” I told her.

Just before we reached the Handhold I turned off down a quiet alleyway. Handers had their quarters here, also there were administrative offices, but it led to one of the genuinely quiet places you could find in the colony. You were only allowed into it for a few minutes and not allowed to stay once your business was done. I had never been there and never thought to go, but I knew where it was, so did everyone. I had often followed couples to the end of the alleyway, as we had been followed ourselves by swarms of lings, but you always stopped at the alley’s mouth, you never went further.

Tealy and I walked down that quiet, empty, narrow place and finally came to the door at the end. A hander stood outside it and asked our names. When we told him, he opened the door and let us through.

I have heard many stories about what the home of the wish stone is like, but I had not believed any of them. The inside of the cube surprised me. None of the stories had been true, but the reality was better.

I do not know what the cube had been originally made of, but it was now lined with the same crystalline material that the box which holds the Helping Hand was made from. A soft light came from no source that I could see, making the crystal reflect and refract in a thousand different colours. In fact it felt rather like standing inside a rainbow.

There was nothing in the room except, in its very centre, a large cube of polished green stone. I had never seen a stone that colour, it was like the green of all fresh, green, growing things, soft and tender like the spring. The stone came up to my waist and as it stood there, softly shimmering in that ethereal light, it looked rather like an altar.

“Is this the Wishstone?” Tealy’s whisper could hardly be heard.

“Yes, Zaeahana,” I whispered back. “If you’re sure it’s what you want…”

“Enough of that!” she said. “If you don’t know that by now then I haven’t done a good enough job of showing you. You are the most special person I have ever met. I couldn’t bear to lose you, now or ever! What do we do?”

“”We take hands, think of, well, of what you just said, of always being together. Then we bend together and kiss the stone.”

Tealy put her hand in mine. I thought about her, of how much she had changed in these last months from the glamorous but basically empty-headed creature she used to be, to the amazing person she was and is now. I thought of how much I absolutely did not ever want to lose her. We bent and kissed the stone together. Then we turned and, still hand in hand, headed out of the door, past the Hander and back the way we had come. We were both too full to speak a word.

A door to our right flew open and Tovey hurried out. We were so absorbed in each other we nearly ran right into him.

“Aha!” Tovey looked triumphant. “Look at the lovebirds. Been to kiss the Wishstone then? Wonderful stuff. Congrats to the both of you!”

WE both blushed and thanked him.

“Come in ‘ere a sec, I ain’t seen you for ages. I got to get these papers to old Orly, but we can catch up for a few.”

We followed Tovey into the small office cube he had just left. A small table, a mountain of paperwork and one chair were all it contained. He perched on the edge of the table and for a few minutes we talked about the family, about his new son and the depredations of the blight. It was when he began to talk about the family’s own losses that I, against my own and everyone else’s advice, decided to try to find out if he knew about Lina and Lita. He looked just as if he had no care in the world, except the normal cares of anyone who had a taxing job, death in the family and a young lepling would have. I just could not work it out. I began tentatively.

“Awful thing about what happened to Lita. I can’t believe what she’s been through this year.”

“Me either.” Said Tovey. “She’d never have made it ‘cept for Lina. Good thing they got each other. Lita’ll be ok wiv us, we’ll take care of her.”

My jaw hit the floor. I could not help it. Tovey was still smiling, perfectly cheerfully telling me he knew all about his wife and my sister and did not care. I looked back at Tovey and found he was not smiling anymore.

“Bert, will you put your eyes back in, your mouth back on an’ stop being such a judgmental zlorfwite! You got a green star cos of who you fell in love wiv! An’ it ain’t like you’re exactly doing fings conventional now, is it! You ain’t got no right to go judgin’ Lina an’ Lita!”

“I’m not, Tovey!” I was horrified, also defensive. “I should zlendt know better than anyone that you can’t control how you feel! But I didn’t want you hurt, you’ve always worked yourself to death for your family and Lina seemed so crazy about you, it just got to me that’s all. And mart! He had a lot to go through this year as well. Ok, he was lousy at handling emotional situations, but he worked his head off to get Danic to the old country and he was still trying to pay the debts. I didn’t think he deserved this either.”

“Mart knew, you zlarthead!” Tovey pushed my shoulder, looking a mixture of amused and exasperated. We been all four of us talkin’ about it since it ‘appened. Once Lara an’ little Alf was a couple of months old we was goin’ to move out of this colony an’ get a place for all of us. Course, that wouldn’t work ‘ere, too many zlenky waggin’ tongues, but Nile was goin’ to get us a place in the country. Anyway,” he said, giving me a big smile. “Not necessary now. I’m sorry about Mart, we’ll all miss ‘im. But we’ll take care o’ Lita. It’ll take ‘er a while before she’s back on ‘er feet an’ she’ll need all our ‘elp.”

A grizzled head and an arm clutching a sheaf of papers came around the door. A testy voice asked if it had to wait all day for those statistics and Tovey had to hurry away. I was left with a lot to think about, mostly that Tealy had been right all along, as she usually was. You never knew what was going on inside a relationship and had no right to meddle in things which did not concern you. Having said that, though, I was glad I knew the score, it gave me one less thing to worry over, I really had been very concerned for Tovey.

When I got back to get ready for Down for Double I was absolutely dropping with tiredness. Tealy had gone thankfully back to her flat in Elfhold. I got through the show somehow and fell into my yawning bed straight after. What a day!

Monday saw my usual little pink scroll on my pillow. I sincerely hoped, as I opened it, that Babsy was feeling better.

“Dear Uncle Bert.”

“I hope you are in good health and that the helping hand is serving you well. I am in better health though still in sickbay.”

“Uncle, I been sick all week long. Sister Fillipy says I’m a lucky ling. Madam Lynnara had to write to Mum an’ Dad cos I got so bad. I ain’t never going to eat another mushroom as long as I live. I heard old nibble got in a heap of trouble cos he didn’t check me mushrooms afore he let me cook them. He had bunked off to find berries or nuts or some such an it was nearly end of lesson so he just checked some of us not all. Anyway he had to go to Professor Delian an they say he’ll get the sack. Good job if you asks me.”

“May the sun shine on you an me too it’s zlenkin freezing here so we wants some sun!”

“Love Babsy.”

When I had written back to Babsy I got on with my day. The family were doing ok from what I read on Facebook. The number of departures from WillSleep were far more than those caused by blight. The council was holding a hearing to find out why the stores were not better prepared against this kind of quarantine and it was widely thought Orlan would lose his job. There was to be a mass farewell ceremony at the Handhold later that day, as it was winter and greenery was scarce and it was thought better that everyone should set out together rather than already weakened families be put to all the trouble of decorating the hold with green so many times over.

I asked for and was given, permission to attend the ceremony, which I did. It was a very sad sight. The hold was always packed to capacity with leps awaiting their turn to say goodbye to loved ones. As soon as your family had been sent on their way you had to leave to make way for others. Leps were sent to the high country twenty at a time. the ceremony went on all day. Over five hundred leps lost their lives through going into WillSleep. Our family was lucky not to lose more than we did. We said goodbye to Bento and Abbinata and their four leplings, to Mart and little Laralina.

As soon as it was over I wanted to come home. Usually a farewell is a beautiful thing, but not this time. Too many were going and it could all so easily have been prevented. I was glad to get back to the living, to my warm, comfortable closet.

On Tuesday Brian left for a two day business trip. I stayed to take care of the house and, as L was still in a good health cycle, we had two lovely days. Brian returned late Wednesday evening and on Thursday we were all here together, having a nice, normal and busy day, all doing our normal work.

Very early on Friday morning Brian and I were up. I was rather surprised not to see L, but did not comment on it. I got Brian some breakfast and packed up his lunch. I had wanted to do this for such a long time. I did say this in the end and believe me I wished I had not, because I got a nasty shock! Brian told me that L would have been doing it, but she had one of her worst Migraines and could not move from bed.

Now this threw me into a complete state because it was L’s birthday and the day on which Tealy and I had planned to take her to the gardens of Everlasting Peace. When Brian had left I cautiously crept to the bedroom door to see if L was really as bad as Brian had said. There she lay, all scrunched up in bed, looking as green as the Wishstone. When I quietly asked if she needed anything she told me to, er, go away because my, um, expletive voice was far too loud.

Glumly I went back to the kitchen and began tackling a pile of dirty dishes. I was midway through these when in zapped Tealy, resplendent in a strawberry pink tee-shirt, jeans and high-heeled pink boots. Her hair was tied in bobbles with strawberries on them, she even had little pink strawberries on her silver bangles. She kissed my ear and asked me why I was not ready to go. When I explained she was not in the least phased. She just marched straight into L’s room.

I heard her voice, L’s grumpy answers and the sound of a spell, then she was out again. She was followed, after a decent interval, by L, dressed for outdoors. Yay, I thought, this might be going to happen after all.

Tealy took L to the middle of the room and her fingers fluttered. Suddenly there was no L. There was, however, a rather fetching lep standing there. She had a cute face with more than a look of L, L’s hazel eyes and long, dark hair, but it was curly not straight and the clips she always tied it up in had gone. Emerging from the dark curls were a very nice pair of upswept lep ears. L’s voice had also gone up to match her tiny size. She seemed very pleased with her new self. Tealy and I took a hand each and we zapped out.

Oh those gardens! How lovely they were! The soft grass, the incredible and myriad varieties of flowers in every colour you could think of, the tall, graceful trees which shaded us, the warm sun, the flocks of brilliantly coloured birds which sang there. We were greeted by a dignified garden keeper in a green robe and told we could wander at will until sunset. A path led through the whole place. I asked him about the legend of the singing flowers which I had heard as a child and was told, to my joy, that they did grow in the garden. We set off to look for them.

After a while, L’s feet got tired, so we stopped to rest. I was just wondering how L was going to manage all the walking when we were sent help in the shape of a tiny, iridescent blue bird. My stars, that bird was a feisty one, I thought she and Tealy were going to come to words at one point, but the bird said she would find help for us. The help cantered up to us a few minutes later in the shape of a pearl white unicorn with streaks of pale blue in its main which, Tealy said, showed it was a young male and a silver horn just beginning to grow.

We got on much faster after that and soon came out of deep forest into a garden containing a wide, deep pool in the centre of which a fountain played, sending sprays of water high into the air. This garden had all manner of fruit as well as flowers growing in it. We were all hungry by this time and it was as well we had been told not to touch the plants or we would have taken fruit from the trees. As it turned out there was no need. A table at one side of the garden was spread with a white cloth and laid with a feast of bread, salads, soft creamy cheeses and mounds of fresh fruit. Silver jugs and goblets were set there too.

It was as L leant over the pool, about to fill a jug with clear water that a wonderful thing happened. I saw the water rippling and we all heard splashing. Soon we could see something, or someone, swimming towards us. When I had been trying to find a place to take L and Tealy had helped me find this place, she had said that a mermaid lived in this pool, but I had clean forgotten it until now.

When the mermaid reached us she broke the surface and we could all see her. She was very small, not much larger than us and the most incredibly beautiful thing you can imagine. Her face was humanoid, but it was not like all those pictures you see in fairy stories. Sailors would not fall in love with it. It was wild, beautiful, the skin was blue, the eyes were a silvery grey. Her hair floated about her in a thick curtain, it glittered in all the colours of the rainbow. Her body was blue to the waste, then her tail was silver. She wore nothing, except that around her neck and on her arms she had strings of polished stones, maybe gems, maybe shells, maybe just pebbles, who knows? They were wound around and around her, they trailed and floated and hung from her.

For a moment or two, she just floated there, lazily flicking her tail to keep herself stationery, then she suddenly held her hand out to L. L put out her own hand. There was a splash or too, a gleam and then the mermaid was swimming away. She had left L with a round, cream pearl, softly gleaming in her palm. The pearl had a small hole through its centre and had obviously been pulled from one of the mermaid’s trailing strands of stones. It was an amazing thing to happen. It was still more amazing to sit at that wonderfully laden table and eat until we were all full!

After that we kept wandering through the beautiful gardens, they seemed to go on forever, until the shadows began to lengthen. WE began to notice a smell on the air. Heavy, rich, sweet, like the most beautiful lilies only better. At last, just as the sun was beginning to redden in the sky, we came to a thick hedge. L dismounted from the unicorn and we entered the final garden through a gap in the hedge.

Hundreds of flowers were growing there, all in rows. They were tall as I was, standing on long, straight stems. They were big as sunflowers, maybe bigger. Their bright white petals glowed, their silver centres seemed to absorb the light so that it almost hurt to look at them. The scent of those flowers filled the air until you felt drunk with it.

Tealy took L’s hand and led her up to the nearest flower. L touched a petal, as we had been instructed to do, but nothing happened. I felt so disappointed, I felt sure the flowers would sing for L. Tealy tried but with no success. I turned to leave, it was time to go.

But then L and Tealy reminded me that I had not tried touching a petal. I demurred at first, saying it was not my birthday. L said that I might as well try since they had.

“Besides,” said Tealy, “You’re very special you know. I bet they’ll like you.”

I touched a petal. They were soft as velvet. Nothing whatsoever happened. I once more headed for the gap in the hedge, but L stopped me.

“Bert, Tealy! Listen. Can’t you hear something?” she said.

“Don’t play games with me, L,” I said, “That’s really mean! It’s only the wind.” But then I heard it too, a slight note on the air, so soft I was not really sure if it was the wind, or something more.

In a second or two more we were all sure. The note hummed on the air, then it was joined by others, then the flowers began a song. It filled the air, it hummed in the ground, it made the sky tremble, yet it was not loud. It was so heart stoppingly beautiful that I wanted to cry. It was so full of love and happiness that I could hardly bear it. And it was for me! It seemed to go on and on and then it softly faded away, leaving us all awestruck.

When we came out of the garden the unicorn had gone and the garden keeper was standing there, waiting for us. He told us we could zap out from here and he hoped we had enjoyed our day. WE hardly had the wits to bid him goodbye before we left. I will never forget that place. Never!

Well, Friday was busy enough, but the weekend was completely mad. We had the usual two shows to get ready on Saturday, but as well as that, L decided she wanted to get some new software on her machine. Brian and I both had to help her. That project took up most of the day and I had my own things to do. The following day was going to be a special birthday edition of Down for Double and I was practicing a song to sing as a surprise.

I was so busy all Saturday. The shows were both great fun, I got my rehearsing done when I could and my word! was I glad to get to bed!

On Sunday morning I was about to get breakfast when Brian told me not to bother because he and L were going out! Well of all the cheek! I went off to the colony in a right sulk I can tell you. The sight of my Tealy girl made up for it. She was all in red that day, red coat over black trousers, red sweater, even red boots and red hearts on her bangles and in her hair. WE had a nice day at the colony. Nothing of note happened much. WE just did a lot of visiting, saw Mum and Dad, Mella and Derry, Kas and Kori, Ikey and Vee and a good few others.

I popped down to the Handhold to see Marni before we left to find out what was happening about the dissolution. Obviously, with Barty still in deep water, the dissolution hearing had been cancelled so she was still stuck in limbo. She was thinking seriously of going back to her cube and taking charge of her lings, as it was all Andi and Gordy could do to care for them with winter coming on, though none of them, thank the hand, had gone into WillSleep during the crisis.

I got back to the Lair well in time for Double and it was a great show. L loved all the songs Brian and I chose for her and the end of the show was just a complete success. Brian played her a special song and then I did my piece. She was very nice to us afterwards. We all had pizza and wine and that was a mentally busy week over.

And so here we are at today. I have done absolutely nothing today except work, work and work at this entry. I am worried because I have not had my usual scroll from Babsy. I have had a scroll every single Monday since she started. I think that tomorrow I will write to Madam Mauraine and see what goes on. I will now go and get some food, I am voraciously hungry.

There! You are up to date at last! Thanks, as ever, for reading my ramblement. I hope you have had a nice couple of weeks. I will write again as soon as I can, until then, take care. Big smiles.